Wait a minute...you get down??? YES, I get down at times, just because I'm a Health Coach that doesn't make me a superhuman. Life hits me full force in the face sometimes, just like all of you. What makes me get back on track and relatively quickly is what makes the difference. My bounce back time gets quicker each and every time I practice these 3 tips that I'm about to share with you and it's these tips and the central ROCK of my life - self-care - that makes all the difference.
Before I share these tips however, I'd like you to think for a minute about the challenges you've faced in your life and the fact that you're here to tell the story, therefore your success rate for getting through tough stuff is 100%. I didn't say it was easy, I didn't say you're not battered or bruised...but you're here today.
The key thing to remember is that we only get to control one thing in our lives, and that's us. So understanding that life is always going to get in way, stress is always going to come at us from a number of different directions, it's imperative that we create a game plan for how we're going to handle it. That being said..these are my 3 go-to tips when I'm feeling down.
1. Look at what you're eating. My guess is, that if you're going through something challenging then you're having a hard time making nourishing food choices, right? In fact, it tends to be the opposite, that's when we reach for sugar laden cookies, comfort foods (often what mum made - like we're trying to get a virtual hug!) wine, cheesy things or fried foods.
What we're actually trying to do is numb ourselves to the sensation that we're feeling. So we STUFF it down, literally with food! Emotional eating is something that just about everyone on the planet can relate to and that's why it's #1 on my list. So, how do we change it? First, try to really think about what you're feeling and where it's coming from...I like to use this F.L.A.B. acronym:
F - frustrated
L - lonely
A - angry
B - bored
Honor your feelings, they matter!!! YOU MATTER!!!
Then start to nourish yourself with healthier choices, they will help switch your brain from that emotional eating place to a more logical place and you'll start to be able to breathe and see the light.
Sugar is one of the toughest ones so I've included here 5 recipes to help you kick your sugar addiction. Just CLICK HERE to download.
2. Move your body. This was a tough change for me, as someone that was an athlete and personal trainer for many years, my go to was to sweat it out! Then, after a life altering car accident and 5 herniated discs I had to rethink what movement meant to me. Sometimes less is more.
I'm still discovering different things that work and am recently doing ELDOA a spine decompression workout, that my good friend and colleague Stacey Stone has introduced to my life and even more recently the wondrous QiGong.
The key...ask your body what it needs...if you're stressed, chances are that your body is tight and holding onto emotions, would you benefit more from something like QiGong that gets your Qi flowing and helps you feel unstuck? Or a yoga class that focuses on breathing and chest opening? Just because you've always moved in a certain way, doesn't mean that's all you can do. Your body will thank you for your kindness and understanding with a sense of well-being and decreasing inflammation.
3. Find Support. The first place to look is within yourself. Are you being kind? Are you nurturing yourself? Or are you beating yourself up? We are all our own worst critic, an unfortunate human characteristic, but you can also make a shift to becoming your inner champion.
Firstly, don't beat yourself up for something you haven't learned yet. Going through life, doesn't mean that we automatically have all the tools to deal with whatever comes our way. I certainly didn't have them when I had my car accident, I had to learn new ways to do MANY things. Keep in mind that we're always striving for PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION.
Secondly, reach out, ask for help. Do you have a friend or family member who's non-judgmental and will give you what you need? If not, let me fill the gap. I help people everyday who are overwhelmed by life, are feeling stuck and don't know how to set up their self-care routine so that the system is in place when they need it. I offer a free, no obligation 30-min strategy session to see which of my programs and which level of support is right for you and your needs.
CLICK HERE TO SET UP YOUR STRATEGY SESSION TODAY
I hope that you find my 3 tips useful, they are my go to when things aren't going great and it's this system that gets me back on track each and every time life comes my way.
Boy, this is something I used to struggle with and I still have to be aware of it from time to time, I would constantly put things off, saying I'd start next week...until I realized that it was because I was afraid that I wouldn't be perfect or the project I was working on wouldn't be perfect, so it was just easier to not start! Can you relate?
If any of the following sound familiar, you too could be on the quest for perfection.
What do all of the above have in common? These are all things that can lead to that horrible, uncomfortable feeling of being stuck. You know what I’m talking about, feeling like you’re just watching your life go by, but not participating. Where you logically know what you have to do, but can’t seem to get unstuck enough to put it into action.
You are not alone!!
I know for sure that over my life I’ve experienced this and so many of clients are feeling this way when we start to work together. I think typically as women, we put so much pressure on ourselves to do everything and be everything for everyone, but only if we do it with perfection does that make us good enough! I know for me, this started back in my childhood and some was the expectation from my parents but much of that feeling was self-imposed. I wanted to make everyone happy, I wanted to make everyone like me and that meant being perfect!
Do any of these sound familiar?
“Why start? I know I won’t get everything done.”
“It’s a crazy week, next week will be better.”
“Whatever I do, it’s never good enough.”
“Guess I’ll try this diet, the others haven’t worked!”
“I know I need to eat better and exercise, but how? I have no time now!!”
What you may not realize is that often, these feelings are coming from us striving for perfection…So, where do we go from here? Firstly I want you all to understand that perfection just isn’t realistic…it’s such an unfair expectation to put upon ourselves or anyone else for that matter. We are all works in progress and need to practice compassion with ourselves as we’re on that journey.
I find that a great way to look at it is, to imagine what you’d say to a child who is coloring a picture, but isn’t able to keep within the lines…do you chastise them? NO we don’t, most of us are going to turn around to that child and say “Hey, great job…you did your best and I love it!!”. Such a different conversation than the one that we typically have with ourselves in our head! Yet, we deserve the same compassion that we so easily give to others.
That being said, I’d like you all to start striving for PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION. Allow yourself time and space to learn new skills, because don’t forget it’s not fair to beat ourselves up for something we haven’t yet learned how to do.
If you don’t have the tools yet, reach out to find support from someone who can help teach them to you…sometimes that’s a family member, a friend or a coach like me, who’s going to provide you with a safe, non-judgmental space to learn how to be you in this kinder more compassionate life.
If you’d like to learn more about striving for PROGRESS not PERFECTION, check out my Keepin’ it Real 28-day program. I designed this program for people like you, who feel stuck and don’t know where to start. Imagine changing the way you eat, feel, look and think in just 28 days.
You see, successfully living a healthy lifestyle is all about moderation. Knowing that you can have certain foods from time to time and most importantly not mentally beat yourself up for having them! Discovering how to live in this place of NON-PERFECTION and being OK with it.
I'd like to find out more about Keepin' It Real in my life.
Spring has officially sprung. A time of year to clear out after winter hibernation. So I just wanted to share a few ideas that might make you look at your spring cleaning differently this year.
1. Let’s start with your home, as it’s what we generally think of first when looking at spring-cleaning. As we all know, in order to do a great job cleaning, first we have to tidy and for many that in and of itself is an overwhelming task.
Where to start?
What to get rid of?
What to keep?
For this task my simple tip is from the Marie Kundo book “ The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up”. You ONLY keep things that bring you joy. It's amazing how this simple mind shift changes everything. My husband and I employed this tactic when selling up home and moving to St. Croix. LIBERATING is the word that comes to mind. Give it a try, you won't ever look back!
Obviously there are some cases where we need to hang on to practical things…the iron for instance, certainly does not bring me joy, but is a necessary piece of equipment. However, when it comes to “stuff” around the home and in our closets, take a close look and get ready to feel the difference when your surroundings reflect what truly brings you joy.
2. Another area of the home that is so often forgotten is our make-up and personal care drawer/cupboard. Did you know that all of our products have a life expectancy written on them? Take a careful look…there’s a little icon that looks like a moisturizer pot with the lid open, with markings that say 6M or 12M for example. That stands for 6 months or 12 months and that’s the time frame where that product will continue to perform at the level expected.
Be aware that if that product contains toxins, as so many of our personal care products do, those toxic ingredients tend to become even more toxic over time. I like to use the “Skin Deep” database found at : http://www.ewg.org/skindeep/ to check the ingredients in my products. Check out things like your moisturizer, shampoo, body wash and make-up and if you’d like a safer option…my go to brand, where I don’t even need to look at ingredients anymore because they do all the hard work for me is Beautycounter. Click HERE to shop or feel free to ask for more information on how to make safer choices.
3. Cleaning out emotions that are no longer serving you.
In this world where we tend to be so busy and as women more often than not, that means taking care of everyone else before we can even consider ourselves, something we need to spend a little time thinking about is our emotional health and wellbeing.
When someone asks how you're doing, is your standard answer either “fine” or “good” quickly followed by “how are you”? It is so much easier to deflect rather than get real and think about how we really are.
The truth is, and I see it everyday in my coaching practice, if we get really honest…so many of us are walking around angry and resentful. Why? I like to think of it this way, (probably the Brit in me, coming out) if we pour cups of tea from the same teapot, all day, every day we end up with no more tea in the pot. We're the teapot and everyone that we give to, are the tea cups…we only have so much tea and then we need to fill up our pot. Unfortunately, we have a habit of trying to keep pouring and pouring for others and not re-filling for ourselves, which in turn leads to us feeling angry and resentful.
So how do we spring clean this area of our lives? I know for many of you, you have no idea how to change or what to do differently and the vicious circle just keeps on repeating and you just keep feeling more and more depleted.
I have 2 suggestions:
A. Firstly, learning to set boundaries is crucial. Easier said than done, I realize, but a new habit that is necessary in order to function without these emotions building up. How do you go about that? Simply, start to listen to your immediate gut feeling. You know that one that screams silently “OMG!!!! ONE MORE THING I HAVE TO DO!!! We all have it, we all know what it sounds like and then we want to please everyone and say “yes, of course” anyway. I want you to start using these phrases and find others that work authentically for you to start setting boundaries:
B. Secondly, we have to learn to let go of those emotions (before we burst!!) and a good way to do that is to cleanse the body and according to Chinese medicine we cleanse the liver and gallbladder in the spring, those organs happen to be the ones that hold onto, you’ve guessed it…anger and resentment!!
So, if you find that you’re holding onto emotions that are preventing you from reaching your happiness potential, join me to cleanse. It is truly a mind, body, spirit journey that will lead to more energy, less anger, weight loss, better sleep and a more confident and happier you!!
I’ve developed a new seasonal cleanse, inspired by my move to St. Croix. I want you all to get a taste of the clean air, fresh food and cool vibes of the island that wraps you up in the sense of wellbeing and pure happiness. The next group cleanse starts 4/20/17, right after Easter and before Mother's Day. What a perfect gift to yourself! Get more info on The St. Croix Cleanse HERE.
Spring is time for renewal and change…I’m here to support you wherever you are in your life journey to create the life you’re craving. Set up a 30-min free strategy session to figure out which of my programs is the best fit for you and your needs.
Why is the gluten free diet and gluten free foods all the rage?
Thinking about starting a gluten free diet? Before you do, it's important to understand what gluten is and how it affects your body. Gluten is a protein found in wheat. So essentially any product made with flour has gluten. There are many other foods that contain it, including soy sauce! It is everywhere.
WHY IS THIS RELEVANT NOW? My theory is, that when our grandparents were growing up, wheat was wheat, untouched, unprocessed and not genetically modified. The wheat that is used today just doesn’t resemble the wheat that our bodies recognize anymore, so we don’t know how to digest it. We can have reactions from very minimal abdominal swelling, bloating and gas to full blown Celiac Disease.
Let me tell you a little bit about my personal gluten story and also my observations with my clients in New Jersey. About 3-4 years ago, I began to realize that I was having digestive issues. They started slowly over the period of several years. After eating I was bloated. My stomach distended and I had horrendous gas pains. At the time, I was a personal trainer and very in tune with my body and eating habits. Gluten seemed like the “buzz” word of the minute, so I decided to give up gluten and see what happened. My whole life changed from that moment on! I am not joking! Now, please keep in mind, I was eating the 100% whole wheat bread and pasta. I was not eating junky food. My symptoms disappeared within a couple of days. Then of course you have to test your theory and reintroduce the old foods, right? What a mistake!
Starting a gluten free diet doesn't mean you have to deprive yourself. I love food and I love to cook. I eat real food, you know the stuff that actually comes from nature the way it was intended. I eat New Jersey local, seasonal and organic foods and I do not find it difficult at all to live without gluten. I do need to point out that at least 90% of my clients find that they do not tolerate gluten once they start to minimize or eliminate it.
If you would like to sit and chat about starting a gluten free diet and intolerances, please set-up your FREE 50 minute consultation TODAY! I will support you on every step of your journey.